Affective Relationships: How am I affecting myself in my relationship?

When talking about Affective Relationships, we need to understand them as a series of feelings that we can feel through family, love relationships or in groups of friends. They can be feelings of anger, joy, anguish, sadness , among other expressions.

In general, all relationships make these feelings possible at some point, because when we live with other people, we go through disagreements, encounters and dialogue disagreements .

In the affective relationships of couples, we need to discuss the presence of each of these ways of feeling. When building a relationship, people seek a relationship of companionship, affection, attention and care, which consequently generate joyful affections.

The joy of being in a healthy relationship makes individual development in all sectors of life (work, university, family, etc.) happen in a creative and inventive way ( MARQUES, 2020).

Sad affections in relationships happen for several reasons, ranging from disagreements between the couple, to situations of jealousy . Could we then say that it is common to feel sad affections in relationships? To some extent yes. These affections can happen at a given moment, but not with continuity, causing feelings of unease, helplessness or depreciating the partner’s self-esteem.

Joyful Affections

Joyful affections in relationships should be the most common, considering that these are what make it possible to maintain a stable and healthy relationship. A secure relationship makes it possible for the couple together to walk a path of companionship in which they can grow together.

Work relationships become more fluid, family relationships more secure, being among friends provides security and fun, and all this is interconnected, because feeling welcomed in a loving relationship makes you face your life in a different way. more spontaneous way.

Affective Relationships: How am I affecting myself in my relationship?

Sad Affects  – Affective Relationships

To discuss sad affections, I would like to bring them through three points: disagreements, jealousy and abusive relationships.

  1. Disagreements: the coexistence between two people with singular opinions will inevitably generate disagreements. This would be something common within relationships between couples. Differences can happen about the movie they want to watch, which show they want to go to, which decoration model to choose for the house. However, these are occasional discussions that are sometimes resolved quickly. That’s not to say they don’t generate stress or wear; can generate, because the way each thing feels is individual to each person, and that’s why it’s important to always keep calm, seek to understand the partner and thus measure what each one can or cannot give up to that the disagreement be resolved.
  2. Jealousy: The so-called “jealousy crises” can happen for different circumstances. They range from self- esteemissues to feelings of insecurity present in the relationship. With this, it is necessary to be aware of the reasons that lead to jealousy. We can go in two ways: 1) connected to you – If you are often jealous of your partner, you need to identify the reasons for these behaviors by raising questions such as: “Do I feel jealous very often?”, “What reasons does my partner give me for me to feel this way?”, “Is it a common behavior in all my relationships?”, “My jealousy is linked to my boyfriend’s actions or my insecurities?”

jealousy crises

  1. These questions serve as a kick-start to generate reflections that allow you to change your behavior, creating relationship strategies that are healthier for you and your partner. 2) linked to the other – In this way you should seek to understand what your partner has done to make you jealous, some questions that can be raised are: “Has he/she ever cheated on me?, “My/ Does my partner not respect my requests?”, “Am I feeling welcomed in my relationship?”, “Has my partner put me down, generating insecurities in me?”So it is possible for you to start working out what affections your relationship is providing you, realizing them, you can talk to your partner, drawing up resolutions to combine the interests of the relationship and solve these problems. The ways to solve it can range from behavior changes to the search for professionals to help you in this process.
  2. Abusive relationships: When it comes to abusive relationships, the questions you should ask are in a different order. It is worth mentioning that abuse can happen in different ways: physical, verbal, psychological or sexual. To start, I will bring some scores:
  3. Abusive relationships do not produce healthy affection;
  4. Relationships hardly start being abusive, these abuses are built little by little;
  5. Getting out of an abusive relationship will never be easy;
  6. You do not deserve to experience any abusive affection.

Affective Relationships: How am I affecting myself in my relationship?

Affective Relationships

In this sense, it is necessary that you start by identifying the reasons that lead you to remain in this relationship. Undoubtedly, the first of these is abuse. The way it is built holds you, sucks you and suffocates you, and even with these feelings, the difficulty of letting go is immense.

Each person in their unique universe will have specific reasons for seeking to sustain the relationship , reasons that are sometimes difficult to identify. However, we can start from some questions, such as: “Have I experienced other abusive relationships?”, “How do I see myself in this relationship?”, “How do I see my partner?”, “Do I deserve to experience a destructive relationship?”, “Can I free myself from this relationship?” .

Draw these reflections, even if you do not reach conclusions, but they will be one of the first steps for you to recognize yourself and what makes you stay in this cycle ( SCORSOLINI-COMIN & SANTOS, 2010).

Abusive relationships end up interfering in all areas of your life. Such as at work , in the cycle of friendships, with your family members. At university or school. Getting out of them or rebuilding them is the possibility of facing life in a healthier way. With joyful affections, with reciprocal care.

Finally, there must always be an understanding. That these sad affections cannot be frequent and you must always be aware of. What has generated them within your relationship. Both to seek actions to resolve them and ways of coping. Frequent sad affects are not normal.

How does psychotherapy help you in the process of sad affections?  – Affective Relationships

Initially, the psychotherapeutic space is a space of reception, listening, where there is no kind of judgment. His affections are widely welcomed. In this space, you will have a place of speech, where you can express yourself and walk new paths of how you feel your affections and how you express them.

RELATED ARTICLE: Abusive relationship: Why Sustain this Abuse?

The feelings generated by disagreements, jealousy or abusive relationships. Are diverse and you don’t always need to be able to deal with them alone. The search for psychotherapy should be seen as a step towards self-maturity.

A space where you can reinvent. The way you see yourself, producing more empowerment. Increasing your self-esteem and allowing you to actively. Place yourself in your relationships, without being. At the mercy of the other’s actions.

Oh! Leave in the comments indications of texts. That are of interest to you, who knows, we may not be able to discuss them here!

Related Posts

Copyright @Vihaa Infosoft